Thursday, October 18, 2012

TV Links of the Week

As if normal zombies aren't tough enough.
They pulled a zombie's face off! How awesomely gross was that? And that wasn't even the most gruesome part of The Walking Dead's fantastic third season premiere last Sunday, which, as usual, scored massive ratings. I won't talk about the most gruesome part, though, since it happened during what's most likely an important scene for the rest of the season. Just know that after filming the scene, Andrew Lincoln was too wired to sleep for a few hours (link contains spoilers).

As stated above, I thought the premiere was fantastic. I know it's only one episode, but maybe the writers have put it together and finally figured out how a group of people would logically survive in a zombiepocalypse. I guess it's only fair to acknowledge that it would probably take a little time for most people to learn the best survival strategies in a real zombiepocalypse, too*, so as long as the writers keep delivering the goods we'll call it water under the bridge. Anyway, if you've ever wondered what "The Walking Dead" would be like as an comedic musical click here.

*Unless you're a male between the ages of 20 and 30, that is.

I'm a couple of episodes behind on Revolution, but apparently the last episode revealed a map of how North America is divided 15 years after the blackout. Entertainment Weekly has a high-resolution image of the map on its website. I like that my home state of Georgia still has its name on the map, and I'd like to think that it's a land flowing with milk and honey where people are still free to live as they please. Why does Texas get to remain just "Texas" and maintain it basic boundaries, though? I know that "you don't mess with Texas," but come on, am I really supposed to believe that Texans are somehow better equipped to survive without electricity simply because they were born in Texas? I think I stand for all non-Texan Americans when I say that it's time for Texans to get over themselves.

Two more things I'm not buying about the map:

  1. I don't think Las Vegas would be part of a wasteland. You don't need electricity to gamble. People would find a way to survive in the desert. If anything, Vegas would be the place where all the mobsters with access to those electricity-generating pendants would hang out to have a good time and charge people to visit so that they could experience the joys of electricity. By the way, if you don't agree that people could learn to survive in a desert merely 15 years after losing access to electricity, then...
  2. You should also have a hard time believing that someone could draw a map like this only 15 years after the blackout. I'm not saying that the world would be devoid of map makers; I'm saying that the world would be devoid of mapmakers that didn't heavily rely on computers or some other forms of electricity to help them accurately draw their maps. It's the same concept as me playing Freecell. I know the basic rules and how to play as long as I'm on my computer. If I had to play with actual cards I'd be lost. Computers are our crutch.
Both 30 Rock and Parks and Recreation are new tonight on NBC. Underwhelming Olympian* Ryan Lochte will appear on "30 Rock" as a "sex idiot." That seems about right. Here's a clip. On "Parks and Rec," it looks like we'll be dealing with Tom in crisis mode as he experiences his own little "Revolution" nightmare. Here's a deleted scene from tonight's episode. Assuming that everything that made it in the episode is funnier than the deleted scene, I'm looking forward to another solid "Parks and Rec" performance.

*I couldn't resist. Would you have preferred "Jorts aficionado Ryan Lochte?"

(Quickly) Emptying the Clip

I know I've only covered a few shows so far, but I've already written a lot, and it's late. I still have a lot to cover, but we're going to do the rest in Emptying the Clip format (otherwise known as bullet points). To help speed things along, we're going to do it to the William Tell Overture. Just click play and enjoy.



  • According to The Hollywood Reporter, Grizz Chapman from "30 Rock" wants his next gig to not involve being a bodyguard for a crazy actor. Or a sane one.
  • Cartoon Network has released two clips from this week's Star Wars: The Clone Wars. If you like Star Wars but aren't watching this show you need to start.
  • Think about the reality show you think is the dumbest on television. It's probably still better than two of the ideas Mark Darnell has been pitched over the years.
  • Have you had the unquenchable desire to watch Claire Danes cry for almost 3 straight minutes? Me neither, but to be honest I didn't know I had that opportunity. Thanks to Slackstory, I do now, and so do you. It may not be the most exciting way you could spend 3 minutes of your day, but if you're anything like me, it's probably not the most boring way, either.
  • Mad Men is apparently filming a scene or two in Hawaii for its season premiere. Or maybe Jon Hamm is just taking a vacation with members of the cast and crew. I don't know if I'd take a vacation in Hawaii right now, though. Have you seen Hawaii Five-O? If that show is even halfway accurate, Hawaii is hands down the most dangerous state in the union.
  • According to Deadline, TNT has ordered six episodes or Frank Darabont's newest TV project, L.A. Noir. The show is based the book L.A. Noir: The Struggle For The Soul of America's Most Seductive City, and is to blame for Shane's (Jon Bernthal) departure from "The Walking Dead" during its second season being revealed early."
  • Finally, here's a clip of Honey Boo Boo reading classic Christopher Walken lines. I'm sure many of you saw or heard about the video of Walken and other cast members from his current movie, "Seven Psychopaths" reading transcripts of Honey Boo Boo on her show. I didn't post it last week because I didn't think it was that funny. This current video is Honey Boo Boo's response. I'm not going say that I lack respect for anyone who watches whatever show Honey Boo Boo is on on TLC, but I don't think I can trust that person's judgement.
Thanks for reading.

Matt